Rock'ed

Actual press release I received this week (with subject heading that read “Shiri Appleby Wears Katie Zorn to Movie Rock’s![sic]”

“Shiri Appleby wears Katie Zorn to Conde Nast Media Group’s Movies Rock 2007
New York, NY
December 2, 2007–Katie Zorn is pleased to announce that Shiri Appleby, star of upcoming Charlie Wilson’s War, wore her deep V dress to the star studded event.”

Too bad Shiri Appleby doesn’t look very pleased. Seriously, have you ever seen a sadder face on a person? It looks like she’s being forced to wear a dress once worn by Miss Puerto Rico. If you’re going to cross-promote with someone (and the inclusion of her new film there clues you in to exactly what’s going on here), at least take a decent picture of her. Then again, maybe she looks like that because someone asked “Hey Shiri, how come your character’s name in the film is Jailbait.” (I really wish I was making that up.)

Also, can we declare a moratorium on the use of the word “rocks?” In the last few days I’ve seen that “Movies Rock” (or in the case of the release above “Rock’s”) “Change Rocks” (the evidence offered in the form of Jeff Tweedy and Stephan Jenkins certain begs the contrary) and “Chicago Rocks” (heard in an on-air promo for The Loop radio station, which then listed several things that supposedly rock including “Millennium Park” which almost made me run off the road). Then, of course, there’s the old chestnut “Cleveland Rocks” and the less said about that the better. (“Chinese Rocks,” on the other hand, is a total different story.)

I’m not even sure what “Rocks” is functioning as in the above examples. Predictive adjective? Verb? And if it’s a verb, what exactly is being rocked? We as a collective? The universe? I’m not a total curmudgeon though so let’s agree to limit its use to only incidences where music is involved and a direct or indirect object is in evidence.

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